


Hickey

by Mainly_theater_stuff



Category: Fifth Harmony (Band)
Genre: Canon, F/F, or as canon as a real people fandom can get
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-10-25
Updated: 2016-05-21
Packaged: 2018-04-28 04:13:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,076
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5077360
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mainly_theater_stuff/pseuds/Mainly_theater_stuff
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Lauren is in love. It's that simple. So why can't she tell anybody?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Will they have to go CSI on this shit?

It wasn’t a big hickey. It wasn’t even a bad hickey. It was just every obvious, and the only one anywhere near her neck. It was right on her collar bone screaming out, saying she belongs to someone, so back the fuck off. Or at least that’s how Lauren felt about it. Sure she liked hickeys mainly because it meant that the person who gave them to her was doing a hell of a good job. And this person, oh god, she could give Lauren hickeys all day every day for all Lauren cared. 

It was a life changing experience mainly because she would only leave one hickey anywhere near her neck the rest were much lower, more private, and more prevalent. They lined the inside of her thighs, her hip and pelves, and sometimes she would find one on her butt. Lauren loved it, but she had to admit there was something annoy with having to cover up one carefully, methodically placed hickey that was purposely put there to make her morning routine just a little longer.   
In fact one morning Lauren didn’t do such a good of covering the famous singular hickey after a long night of love making. 

The girls had dance rehearsal, they were changing the choreography of one of their songs to Live Stream concert. It was an exciting performance and they wanted everything to be perfect, so that meant getting up at 5 AM rehearsing for several hours before doing things like interviews or photo shoots, and then performing in the night. It would all be worth it in the end. Oddly enough even when only thing Lauren wanted to on the way to the hotel was to be asleep as soon as she got in bed. She would enter whatever hotel room they were staying that time around and her love would be right there, and she had all the energy in the world. 

But on this one day, just four days before the Live Stream, Lauren had forgotten to reply the makeup on her neck before glams. The makeup artist was contouring Lauren’s face when she asked Lauren to turn her head a little more to the left, and there it was, clear as day a hickey.

See the big problem that came up for Lauren was that she was so used to the hickeys covering her body. She saw them every day, and just when a group of them would fade her love would be back with her glorious lips, and new marks would need to be covered. Lauren didn’t think twice about them, but the makeup artist almost dropped her brush at the sight of the purple-y red bruise. 

“Um, Lauren?”

“Yeah,” Lauren said looking up, “What’s up?”

“Do you want me to cover this up?” The artist asked unsure how to not offend the most private member of the girl band. 

“Cover what?” Then Lauren say it in the mirror, “Oh shit.”  
   
“So I’ll take that as a yes.”

“No duh. Of course that’s a fucking yes,” Lauren hissed. She glanced around the room quickly. Ally had left the room to talk to Troy on the phone. Camila was reading on the couch next to Dinah who was on her phone, and then Normani next to Dinah also on her phone. They all seem thoroughly uninterested which relieved Lauren only the smallest bit. She didn’t want the girls knowing about the relationship, yet not a relationship she had. She loved it, her love loved it, but having the rest of the girls know about was something she just didn’t want to deal with. 

After a few beats of silents followed by Dinah laughing loudly at something on her phone and insisting that Normani must watch, did the artist start her quite teasing.   
“So a new boyfriend?” The artist asked coolly. 

“What?” Lauren snapped.

“Well this hickey didn’t just end up on you, so a new boyfriend just seems like the logical answer.” 

“It’s not a - you don’t know - I don’t have to - there’s nothing to know.” 

“What was that?”

“I don’t have a new boyfriend.”

This surprised the artists but she took it in strides, “Oh so new girlfriend. Good with her tongue.” She paused for barely a second before laughing at her own joke. 

“This is none of your-“ But Lauren was cut off by Dinah. 

“Did you just saw what I think you said?” She so excited Lauren almost cringed, but then she actually did when Camila chimed in too. 

“She did. Lauren has a girlfriend who’s really good with her tongue.” Camila made a V with her fingers in front of her mouth just to make Dinah laugh, which she did. She laughed and laughed before getting up from the couch and over toward Lauren. 

“Who’s the girl? When ya meet? When did ya start the nasty? Is it good? Do we know her?” The questions were fast and building in volume. Until a loud gasp came from Camila who still sat on the couch. 

“China, she has to be on tour if the hickey is that fresh.”

“Oh my god you're right. Let's go CSI on this shit and figure out who it is.” Dinah was way too excited for Lauren’s comfort, but she was stuck in the makeup chair, and unable to talk because of the lip stick that was being forced on her. She had to sit silently as Camila and Dinah went through the entire list of possible "lesbo-lovers” for Lauren. 

It made Lauren want to scream because her "lesbo-lover” was on the same fucking couch as them, and all Normani was doing was slowly losing her shit at the hilarity of the situation. And it didn’t help that she was making a whole lot eye contact with Lauren that only caused her to laugh even more. 

Dinah finally caught on to the laughing girl next to her and demanded, “Mani do you know something we don’t? Cause know would be an awesome time to cough that up.” 

“Me? What? No. I know nothing.” Normani could barely get every word out without laughing. 

Lauren was finally freed, and she turned on her bandmates “Will you stop? This is not funny.”

“Are you kidding me?” Camila insisted, “This is the funniest and most interesting thing to happen in weeks.” 

“Yeah, Lo. It’s fucking hilarious.” Normani chuckles into her hands. 

“You don’t get to say shit.” Lauren threatened. 

“Oh really? I don’t get to say shit.” Normani said. Lauren’s remake had defiantly calmed her laughing. This was just as much of her’s as it was Lauren’s. It took two to tango, and these dance partners were about start the worst of dances: the lover’s quarrel. 

“I didn’t mean it like that exactly. It’s just you were laughing at me.” Lauren tried to back peddle, “In the not endearing way.” 

“Ok, sure.” Normani said arms crossed in front of her. 

Normani wanted the whole world to know that her and Lauren were together, never mind the girls, but Lauren was so private. She feared what would happen if they came out, as not only a couple, but as individuals. At first Normani thought that Lauren feared that their fans might turn on them, but she soon realized through the random thought that would come pouring out of Lauren after they had made love, curled up in each other, that she feared what her home would think. 

She fear what her parents would think, and her brothers, and her friends from home, and all the people that made up her entire life before Fifth Harmony. She fear their hate, their disgust, and their disownment. That all seemed so small to Normani; their families were important, but old friends and neighbors that seemed just ridiculous. What did it matter what they think?

 But it matters so much to Lauren because she needed these people to see her as everything she was, not who she became after the fame. She needed people in her life who just saw her as Lauren, not Lauren who was on X Factor, not Lauren from Fifth Harmony, not Famous Lauren. She depended on the times she saw these people as a way to put her mind back together. She needed to be reminded of her insignificance in the world, even though that’s all she seemed to think about. So Normani let them be a secret. She settled for pictures on just her phone, and not Instagram, she settled with long kisses at night that always seemed to turn into something neither of them were looking for at the start of the first kiss. She settled with laughing I love you’s in front of anyone, and deep overwhelming ones when it was just the two of them. She settled so much that sometimes Normani truly felt that this was all Lauren’s; that the only thing in their deep love affair that was her’s was the hickeys that she left over Lauren’s perfect skin. 

Normani wasn’t one for ultimatums, but it seemed that’s what was need here.  
“Do you get how much simpler this would all be if you could tell them? How much funnier? How much easier everything would be? If you, not me Lauren, but you, could tell them?” 

Lauren was shocked. Where was this coming from? Why now? Why here in front of Dinah and Camila? It didn’t make any sense. Sure she knows that Normani wanted to be more public about their relationship, but Lauren could never imagine Normani backing her into a corner like this. 

“I don't - this doesn't -What?!?”

Normani took a step closer right next to Lauren’s ear and whispered ever so sweetly, “I love you and you love me, so why can’t I kiss you right now.”

“Mani I just got my makeup done.” The sarcasm sounded more desperate than she wanted it too, but what else was she suppose to say. 

“You know what if you don’t want to be honest, fine, don’t be but I’m done.” Normani turned and walked out of the dressing room door. 

Lauren was shocked. She had no one idea that Normani felt that way about their relationship. Her mind was so lost in what just happened that she simply stood there, feet showing no signs of moving at all.


	2. Relationships Weren't this Hard in Elementary School

Camila was speechless, not so much at the revolution of the relationship between her band mates, but rather what just happened in front of her. Dinah just laughed, a small knowing laugh, “Whatcha standing here for? Go get your girl.” 

“My…what?”

“Your girl!” Dinah screamed. Lauren looked at the two girls on the couch and then at the door, and back again. She wasn’t sure why she was hesitating but it seemed her body just wouldn’t check up with her mind.

Finally, after what felt like a century, she felt a hard shove on her back courtesy of Dinah. The movement gave her just enough momentum to start walking. 

Outside the dressing room, she could hear their opening act down the hall, and a stagehand walked quietly will talking into a headset, but there was no sign of Normani. Lauren has two options: go toward the stage or go toward the exit. For some reason something compelled her toward the stage, then beyond the stage and into the stadium they would be performing in later that night. She walked across the smooth cement to the back of the floor where stairs went on for about 40 rows. She took them two at a time the feeling that this was the right direction growing stronger with every step. Once at the top of the steps Lauren turned to take in the view of the stadium, and the stage. She never really saw their performance space from this angle. She scanned, the what seemed like endless rows of seats until three sections over from where she stood Normani was sitting. Her headphones on and what seemed liked eyes closed. 

Lauren walked quickly then jogged then ran toward Normani needing her to know what their relationship meant to her. 

When they were in the same row Lauren, none too gracefully, sat down next to her and waited for Normani to notice. 

It didn’t take very long and Normani almost jumped out of her seat when she realized someone has joined her.

“Holy shit, Lauren.” Her hands taking off her headphones so they could rest around her neck

“What? Did you think I wouldn’t come after you? That I would just let you run out.” Lauren tried to be serious but her voice came off more hurt than anything.

“Yes, I did.”

Lauren had imaged at one point in their relationship that the worse thing Normani could say to her was that she didn’t love Lauren. But she was wrong. With those three words, Lauren was suffering. She was dying of a slow impending heartbreak, but all she could say was, “Oh.” 

“I wanted to have more faith in you. In your faith of this,” she gestured between them, but Lauren still wasn’t looking at her. “But then, Lo, you kept saying how you hated people knowing about your private life. How it was the only thing you had left. How you would die if more of that got taken away.” Normani was look out at the stadium. At the pair of men who moved massive stacks of folding chairs across the sleek cement floor. 

Their conversation was running out of time.

“At first, I agreed with you,” that had Lauren looking at Normani so fast it might have caused whiplash. “At first. But then we were three months in and I had to question if I could tell my mom. My mom, Lauren. I tell her everything, and you know it, and do you remember what you said to me and how you said it,” Normani was crying. “You said well I told Taylor so it’s only fair.” The tone was sharp, mocking, and it made Lauren wince a little at the memory. 

“I questioned telling, my Mom, how I was so in love with this amazing girl, who loved me back, and who I felt fearless with because all I could think about was you not liking it. Only to have you turn around and joke like it was nothing. After you made a point of keeping us private from everyone. And here we are almost a year and a half later, and the girls don’t even know.” Lauren gave her a look, and Normani rolled her eyes trough the tears building in her eyes. “We’ve never told them, ok? So maybe now you understand why I thought you wouldn’t run after me. A little part of me hoped you would as I stormed out, but then I remember the look on your face and I thought there was no way in hell.”

Normani was balling her eyes out. All Lauren wanted to do was wipe those tears out of her eyes, and kiss her, and tell her that she doesn’t care about what anyone else thinks just Normani. But she doesn’t, because then she would lying. 

“I wasn’t shocked by what you were saying, I mean I was, but I was more shocked by when you were saying it.” Lauren wanted Normani to understand everything that was racing through her head, but she could barely understand it herself. 

“I love you so much, Normani, and I hate the way I feel like I can’t have anything to myself. I hate that I feel so insecure about us.” Lauren had joined Normani with the crying. 

“Love, what are you afraid of? That as soon as other people know we’re together that I’m gonna want to break up with you?” Normani was so shocked by how honest Lauren was being about her feelings toward everything that she could help but add some honesty of her own. 

“Yes, well no. I’m..” Lauren let out a long shaky breath. “I’m terrified that once people know about us it will ruin everything. That we won't be the same, and it will all go to shit, and we won't be us anymore, and we’ll break up because people questioning everything we are will be too much for us and plus who wants to deal with all that bullshit that comes with being fucking famous!!!” Lauren was up and passing the floor. Something she often did when she was anger. 

“Lauren, I don’t want to tell the world either.” Normani got up and grabbed Lauren’s wrist. They were looking at each neither knowing what the other was thinking. Lauren thinking that whatever Normani said she didn’t want this to be the end. Normani hoping she would say the right thing, but she had no idea what that was she never did when it came to Lauren, so instead she settled on the truth. 

“Love, all I want is to tell the girls, even though I’m pretty sure they know.” She chuckled a little and to her shock, Lauren did too. “I want to tell my family and bring you home with me once or twice. You know the few times we can afford to go home. Nothing big. Just us and the people who care about us the most; those are the only people who need to know.”

 

“Right, the people need to know.” Both looked at each other when she said it because it was hopeful. It was hopeful that never happened with them. Being hopeful about the future, about where their relationship was heading. “So those are the people who you think need to know.”

“They’re the people I want to tell. They don’t have the right to know, but I want them to.” 

Lauren let out a long sigh then she said, “Ok.”

“Ok?”

“Yeah.” The hug is immediate, and bone crushing. Lauren melted into it. 

The men on the floor of the stadium were starting to yell at each other as they walked off, and the two girls knew that they had to get back. Someone would come looking for them, and that was never a good thing. 

They stood side by side and hand and hand.

“So,” Normani said.

“So,” Lauren copied. 

“We should go back.” 

“Yeah. Tell the girls.”

That small comment had Normani smiling wider than before as Lauren led her down the steps and across the perfectly smooth cement toward the end of their secret.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I took so long to update. I should have the next chapter in a week or so. If you're still reading thanks for sticking around.

**Author's Note:**

> Kodo this is you want more. I have a start for a second chapter, and I think this will be three chapters. Leaving a response of some kind though definitely helps to keep writing.


End file.
